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Santa Claus is Making a List and Czeching it Twice – Part Two

Unfortunately – Brian Gionta was caught as an imposter and tossed into a snow bank outside Santa’s workshop. Fortunately , the Montreal Canadiens have an abundance of  ‘ elf-ish’ characters.

Le Forum de Montreal recruited David Desharnais and sent him to discover more of the fat-man’s notes …


Mike Cammalleri

Mrs. Claus thinks he has a cute bum / Good

Appears to have a ‘ Diva ‘ mentality / Bad

Too many M’s and L’s in his name / bad

Can score from one knee / Good

Can’t score from one knee / Bad

Gift decision – A mirror

Erik Cole

Family name rhymes with coal / Bad

Fast and strong on the puck / Good

Has all the cheerleaders and their sister’ s phone numbers from time in Carolina / Very Good

Shares broken vertebrae tales openly with Max Pacioretty / Good

Has no chin / Bad

Gift decision – Rod Brind’ Amour as a line-mate

David Desharnais

Suspicions of imitating one of my elves / Bad

Even on top of Gionta’s shoulders – still cannot clean banners / Bad

Stand – in for Smurfs movie / Good

Able to skate between  Zdeno Chara’s legs / Excellent

Carrying the french-Canadian torch all by himself/ Good

Gift decision –  An autographed DVD copy of  Bon Cop , Bad Cop

Lars Eller

Pale / Bad

Has not hit coach Martin with stick / Bad

Learning Swiss language to banter with Diaz and Weber / ‘ A ‘  for effort

Still has not taken down Halak name plate from locker / Bad

Gets a point every thirty – six games / Not-so-good

Gift decision – An offensive-minded coach

Brian Gionta

Captain of the team / Good

Hardest working player game in and game out / Good

Friends with Scott Gomez / Very bad

Victim of ‘ keep away ‘ game with Hal Gill once a week / Bad

Nobody on team ‘ looks up ‘  to him / Bad

Gift decision – A two-week  ‘ sans Grinch ‘ paid vacation to Who –  ville.

Scott Gomez ( not enough coal in the world ).

Andrei Kostitsyn

Related to Sergei / Bad

Ties to Russian mob / Could go either way ( check life insurance policy ).

Nickname ( AK46 ) attached to assault weapon / Bad

Natural goal scorer when applies oneself / Good

Does not apply himself / Bad

Gift decision – A toupee

 Travis Moen

Appeared in episode of Corner Gas, Mrs Claus ‘ favourite show / Good

On pace to score 20 goals / Good

Looks like Mr. Ed the talking horse / Bad

Tough / Good

Corner Gas no longer a sitcom / Bad

Gift decision – DVD copy of Brent Butt ‘s new show ‘ Hiccups ‘ .

Max Pacioretty

Has recovered from broken vertebrae / Good

Did not use stanchion to avoid suspension when hitting Letang / Bad

Good looking girlfriend / Good

Second in scoring on the team  / Good

Wept openly upon learning of Spacek ‘s departure / Good

Gift decision – A copy of Montreal police report alleging  Chara assault charge ( signed by Chara ).

Tomas Plekanec

Missing H in name ( what’s up with these Czechs ????) / Bad

Nice goatee / Good

Position # 1 as  scorer on team / Good

Position # 1, 476 as scorer in the league / Bad

Along with Kaberle – now known as ‘ The Killer T ‘ s ‘ …  / Hmm-mm …

Gift decision – Consistent line-mates

Petteri Nokelainen

Sticks up for team mates / Good

Receives emails from Saku Koivu once a week / Good

Makes fun of Eller’s accent / Bad

Good face-off guy / Good

Will not shorten name to Pete / Bad

Gift decision – Teemu Selanne’ s recipe from the fountain of youth.

Stay tuned for more of Santa ‘s list ….

In the meantime – check out Knuckles , Habs Eye on the Prize and Hockey inside Out

For all your computer needs … Greg Senneville at  PC-TECK  in the Pointe Claire Plaza  will be glad  to help – 514 505 4040 .

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1 Comment

  1. Yes Francesca – There is a Santa Claus « Rick Keene ' s Le Forum de Montreal

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